Monday, August 29, 2011

Just a new page

I have this sudden urge within this small complicated heart of mine where I need a definite place to spell down one undecided feeling after another so I could properly and gradually breathe in peace.

I did not need human beings to really capture what I am saying, but more like a space for my heart to widen up its bunny ears and listen and understand.

I stopped writing properly in this blog of mine like what, several months ago? I think. It was the lowest point of my life when in a second I was rolling in the deep, cursing over some failing actions of mine and stopped everything I was doing.

And now I just feel and think and sense that I should start arranging my emotions into words again. I have finally come back to my senses again.

I dont know what might have stopped me before ; maybe its failing love or failing career, or struggling mind or unstable heart or all of the above. Whatever the reason might be, now I am ready to rock and roll again. With a brand new music yet the same old singer.

Well, it is Raya Eve and I feel at ease. A bit exhausted, but a really good one. Like I have accomplished something. And I am sitting here in this not-so-comfortable-creaky chair, but still have lots to let out. Then again, I do feel at ease. And that is important to me!

Tomorrow is 1 Syawal, a celebration day for all Muslims after a long month of Holy Ramadhan which gave nothing but blissful days and blessing from God.

One thing I wanna attain or would I say, accomplish from this comeback is for me to really understand myself, from the very root. I have lost myself along the way, and I think I could somehow learn a thing or two from the writings that I will build up one chapter at a time.

Another thing would simply be, for my English writing to improve gradually. I hope I could go into creative writing one day, but for now, lets broaden our English vocabulary first. :)

Salam Aidilfitri to all Muslims around the world.